Posted by: cousinbrandon | March 29, 2010

Hai(ku) Atop the Silver Branches: The Week in Twitter Haiku

The title of this week’s post is a nod to Elf Power’s “High Atop the Silver Branches,” from their 1999 release A Dream in Sound. What does this have to do with haiku? Not a damn thing. Regardless, I highly encourage you to check out the link to the song, as it’s completely indicative of the whole Athens-based Elephant 6 collective. And if you’re not familiar with this “ensemble,” I’m referring to bands like Neutral Milk Hotel, The Apples in Stereo, Circulatory System, et al. I have little else to add today, frankly because it’s Monday and my weekend was nightmarishly long at best. I think my brain broke. Again.

This installment of haiku covers Monday, March 22, 2010 through Sunday, March 28, 2010, covering spring cleaning, taxes, LOST, my cat, insomnia, Easter and pancakes. As always, you can find this collection here every Monday, or go on over and subscribe to my Twitter feed (@CousinBrandon). Cousin Brandon: come for the funny, stay for the self-loathing.

I’ve Unlocked One of Life’s Great Secrets Haiku (March 22, 2010)

Five hours cleaning,
now I feel like shit? Lesson
learned: no more cleaning

My Tax Return was Rejected for the Second Time Haiku (March 23, 2010)

Okay, Government,
I can take a hint. I’m now
off the grid. Adieu.

I Really Need to Have a Talk With the Powers That Be Haiku (March 24, 2010)

My job is getting
in the way of my blogging.
I’m here for you, LOST.

As It Turns Out, I Now Speak Feline Haiku (March 25, 2010)

When your cat meows
at 3 AM, it’s her way
of saying, “Fuck you.”

I Can’t Quite Figure Out Why This Friday Already Sucks Haiku (March 26, 2010)

There’s something about
waking up at 4:30
that pisses me off.

Shouldn’t Being Jewish Get Me Out of Easter Egg Hunts? Haiku (March 27, 2010)

Saturday morning.
9 AM. 30 degrees.
I’m more wronged than Job.

What I, Super-Dad, Cooked My Daughter for Breakfast Haiku (March 28, 2010)

I made pancakes with
vanilla. Okay, so I
drank all the extract.

Well, that’ll do it for this week. Until next time, have at it, you vultures!



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