Posted by: cousinbrandon | December 15, 2010

The 12 Days of Pissed Miss: Helliday “Cheer,” 2010 (Day 11)

Okay, so Karen failed to change her sign this morning, which is why I was forced to literally get out of my car and walk around to the other side of the billboard. That’s where I found this:

Karen’s yard. Walnut Street, Harrisburg. 6:42 AM. December 15, 2010.

Honestly, I haven’t got a goddamn clue as to what it means, which only further supports my theory that she’s insane. I mean, who has this sign made?! Lunatic.

Short and sweet today, as I’m too tired and too confused to do anything more. So, until tomorrow, have at it, you vultures!




  1. Wait, if I call 463-4316 will someone advise me that it’s wrong to be a democrat, or to listen to anything but Amy Grant records?

    • Why can’t it be both?

      • Sorry, poorly placed comma. This “Baby Baby” song is fuckin kick ass man. Go Jesus.

        • Are you referring to Bieber? Yeat, that little fucker is magical.

          • Nah man. Just rockin out to some sweet Amy Grant. It puts my heart in motion.

            Beiber is certainly a candian version of Merlin though. I do agree. Merlin with such great hair. Swoon.

  2. It sounds like that sign was translated into Japanese and then back into English.

    • See, I was under the impression it was translated into right-wing shitbag and back into English, but I could be wrong on this one.

  3. I was curious and typed in “Wonder Councelor” into google and found this gem
    from The United States Conference of Catholic Bishops via ISAIAH:

    “5. For a child is born to us, a son is given us; upon his shoulder dominion rests. They name him Wonder-Counselor, God-Hero, Father-Forever, Prince of Peace.”

    I prefer SOCIALIST-DEMOCRAT, or WHORE-FUCKER. But what the hell do I know?

    • O, Google, YOU are the Wonder Counselor!

  4. Always the bridesmaid CB. Why the hell didn’t you get off your tucas and do an 8 days of Chanukah or, in your case, Honkey-kah?

    The signs could’ve been faaannntastic.

    “People who doubt Moses’ power are all wet.”

    “Defensive Coordinators who cook put together great Blintz packages.”

    “I’ll jerk off all I want! There is no Hell!”

    Etc, etc.

    • Unfortunately, MM, there aren’t too many pro-life, right-wing Jews in this town with crazy-ass signs on their lawn, so I take what I can get.

      Menorahs for Horahs!

      • “People who doubt Moses are all wet” is pretty classic. Nice work there.

  5. No, no, no, Brandon. I’m proposing that next year, YOU be the pro-life, right-wing, bi-curious jew with signs on his lawn.

    • And who says I’m not already? I just photograph her shit because there’s more sport in it, sort of like birdwatching.

  6. FYI: Karen failed to change her sign this morning. With any luck, she’ll have done so by this afternoon.

    If there’s anything I hate, it’s a lazy extremist!

    • God-Hero (Sandwich)
      Wonder (Bread) – Councelor
      Prince of Peace (of shit)
      Father-Forever (XXI)

      • Well, it seems the lexicon has been officially finalized…

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